Catch your children doing well and compliment them like crazy. When I mean like crazy, I mean all the time. Any time a thank you or please comes out of my kids’ mouth I say, “I have such polite girls.” When they obey right away I thank them and give them a compliment. Try to recognize them for the way they’ve behaved in a store, the artwork they’ve created, the thoughtfulness they’ve shown to a friend, the honesty they’ve had in a difficult situation, the way they’re playing with their siblings – everything. Look for the good all the time and acknowledge it. I try and speak the qualities I want in a child. If I catch one behaving who has been challenging lately I say, “Oh, I have a girl who obeys so well” – even if it’s true only in that moment. I have seen them rise to the compliment. I have also seen them rise to their siblings compliment. I say, “Oh, Abby, you obeyed and got your shoes right away. What a good job.” A second later Kenzie is up and running toward her shoes.