How to Stop the Whining and Crying in Kids

You have worded this very well. I love it. It’s funny how we have to work on our own “temper tantrums” too (like you talk about in your article). I feel it, and I often have to remove myself when I feel frustrated. I really try and voice things just like I want my kids to, “I’m feeling angry right now because…” It’s a conscious decision for me. I imagine if it’s challenging for me, it has to be that much harder for my own kids. I love that Psalm 4:4 verse that you gave me. I think I want to add this verse to my post. It’s exactly what I am promoting. Thanks for introducing yourself. I’m excited to follow you now.

I totally hear your heart on this. I am sorry for what you experienced that has made you stuff your emotions. I in no way want that for my kids, and it’s not my heart in the article. I agree with you that this can be taken in the really wrong way if you don’t know the entire approach to my parenting. That is part of the reason why I linked to my post about having kids learn to identify and express their emotions. My whole point with the concept is to get kids to a place where they are able to talk about their feelings in a constructive way. Kids often whine and cry because they learn it gets them what they want – either attention or something physically. It’s not an appropriate way to act, and it will drive people away. I really want my kids to learn to voice, “I am frustrated right now because…” I really try and help them label their emotions so that we can learn how to positively deal with the feelings. Feelings should be validated, but how we respond to feelings can be taught. For example, if I bite everyone’s head off that I want to when I feel pre-menstral, it wouldn’t be constructive. It would be damaging. Part of the growing up process, I feel, is identifying the emotion, trying to figure out the root and then handling it in a way that glorifies God – despite my feelings. I try and get my kids to listen to their bodies – are you hungry? are you tired? do you need alone time? are you angry? frustrated? scared? Let’s not use those things as an excuse. We can identify them, feel them deeply (because we will) and then learn to rely on God to help them navigate these emotions in a way that is healthy. I hope that gives a bit more insight into my heart on this. I think “happy heart” is easy for 2 year olds to grasp visually and recognize with parent demonstration. As my kids age, I use terms that are a bit more abstract – like “You need to get self control so that we can explore your feelings in a healthy way.” Happy heart is really for those preschoolers to relate to.

Thanks for your thoughts. I do want to clarify that we talk about the feelings and try to identify the emotions going on after he or she has calmed. I might say something like, “It seems to me you felt frustrated…” Then, I would give them the tools for communicating that in a different way. That might help how you feel about it, or it might not. I hope you find something that works great for your family.

I’m so embarrassed about how long it has taken me to respond. Trying to be a mom and keep up with all the different components of blogging can be a challenge and sometimes comments take a back seat, but I do want to respond. I like your approach and appreciate you weighing in on the discussion. I think you handle it well. I think certain kids might be different in this area. We have found that by keeping the kids (especially one of them) with us, the drama gets bigger, and she tries to manipulate the situation. I have found that when she has a little time to cool down on her own and think things through a bit, she comes back willing to discuss her feelings and frustrations in a healthy way. I try to not ignore what happened when she comes back. They say that when a child is angry, it takes them a certain amount of time to calm down where their brain is able to process information at all. She has an opportunity to calm down and then we get to teach, encourage, listen and talk through. While some of this is definitely developmental, I also feel like it is our responsibility as parents, to usher them on to a more effective way of communication. I am sure you feel the same way but have a different approach. I appreciate your opinions and really do hear what you have to say. Thanks for communicating with me in such a respectful way.

I appreciate that different families have things that work and don’t work for them. I do need to let you know that we work really hard on helping our kids express their feelings in appropriate ways. This technique is for when there are inappropriate shows of drama and freaking out because they are not getting there way. I wish you well on whatever technique you use for raising your kiddos.

I think you have really summarized my heart for this method well. I have found that, especially with my daughter, that time away to cool down is exactly what she needs to be able to talk through how she’s feeling in a productive way. I know some feel like it’s horrible to not sit and comfort the child every time. I want my kids to identify and express their emotions, but I absolutely believe it is a parent’s responsibility to teach kids what kind of communication is acceptable. Screaming and whining isn’t a way we communicate in society if we are wanting to be a productive citizen. If one child is dominating attention because of their poor behavior or tantrums, it’s not fair to the rest of the family. That child is also modeling that if you throw a tantrum you get mommy’s attention. I believe the times to have them go away to gather control vs. a time for comforting are situational. There’s not the exact solution ever time, but I’m not going to let one child negatively impact the atmosphere in our home by responding dramatically. Thanks so much for weighing in your thoughts and seeing my heart.

Thanks so much! I am so glad you like this idea. I hope it is helpful!

It was a little tricky at the beginning, but I did start this at 18 months with all my kids. I think that is why I use the phrase “happy heart.” It’s a little more understandable to the younger ages. We can explain about self control and expressing ourselves in a constructive way when they’re older. I would sit my kids on the stairs and explain things. I would say something like, “I want to play with you. I want to know why you are upset. I need you to get a happy heart and then you can come back.” I would point to my face and show a smile and repeat the words “happy heart.” If my child got up and followed me still crying and whining, I’d pick her up and put her back, demonstrating the face again with, “You need a happy face.” It wasn’t magic at first and I’d have to put them back a number of times, but they caught on fairly quickly. They began to understand that they could come back when they were done pitching a fit. I would then try and define what they felt. Were you sad? Frustrated? Angry? At the younger ages, I would try and define it for them. “You were frustrated because you wanted that toy. When you want something, you can’t whine and cry or you won’t get it.” I often say, “We don’t get anything when we whine and cry.” I do want to clarify that this is for times they are pitching a fit, usually because they want their way. I don’t use this technique when they are just sad about something, hurt themselves, etc. I try and be compassionate at appropriate times and use the technique for when they are carrying on in ways that usually reflecting a heart condition.

I am so sorry for what you are experiencing. Parenting is so hard. I can’t imagine how much harder it is as a single parent. I also want to say, first of all, that I’m so sorry about what happened at VBS. I work with kids at church, and I know there are kids that are more challenging to work with. However, the whole gospel message is that it’s not about how you perform because we all fall flat. The church is the one place that your child should be loved well and greeted with open arms. I totally understand how it’s hard to deal with an unruly child, and you don’t want other kids to be neglected because of the one child. I don’t want to judge this particular church or the challenges (maybe lack of volunteers) that they are dealing with. I would just hope that the church could clearly teach the gospel message – that none of us is good enough, but Christ loves us and has grace for us despite our stuff if we decide to put our faith in Him. I just wish your daughter (and you) got that picture through your experience. So, I’m sorry. Again, I wouldn’t dismiss this church, but it might be worth a loving, understanding conversation. You could even ask them for advice because you are at a loss. OK – Now onto the question about your daughter. It is so fascinating to me that she doesn’t act out like this at home. I would imagine you are working pretty hard, but I would encourage you to take a day or two off and see if you can sit in a classroom or Sunday School class to observe her behavior. It might give you some insight as to what you are up against. Then, you can work toward putting a unique plan of action for your child at school and home. I would encourage you to become a team with the school because you know they want these kids to succeed. You’ll need to follow through on your part with your daughter at home. Don’t blame the school or put this on their shoulders. This will have to be a team effort. Is your daughter able to express what is going on with her or how she feels when she starts to want to act out. I would try to hear her voice as much as possible. She might have frustrations about her dad – lack of or sharing situation (I don’t know the situation there) that is manifesting itself in this way. Counseling or intervention might help if there are big issues there. There are a few other things that come to mind (some opposing thoughts because each kid is so different). The first I observe in one of my children. When there is “crazy” on the outside, she feels the chaos inside her. It builds, and she acts out in inappropriate ways. She is opposite, however, in that the crazy builds until she comes home to me where it explodes. This year I have requested that she be in a classroom with a lot of structure. However, we can’t adjust everything to fit our child’s individual personality. The fact is that our kids need to learn self-control and coping tools despite their circumstances. The world can’t adjust everything to my child’s temperament. Therefore, what kind of outlets can I give my child to help her cope within the moment? With the crazy my child feels, I have given some choices for her. Of course, this is easier at home than at school because you don’t have the schedule or other kids to deal with. I have found that sometimes my daughter needs some alone time to re-group. I will send her to her room to try and relax and read at moments. Sometimes the opposite is the solution. I encourage her to get the crazy out by running up and down the sidewalk, doing handstands and cartwheels, punching pillows or play dough, coloring or doing something physical to release some of the pent up energy. I have learned to tell what she needs, and she is learning to express it. OK – The weird thing is I’m going to offer up a different thought…like I said, kids are so different, and it takes some observation to learn what works for your child. The opposite thought, therefore, is your child might do well with a teacher that has a little less structure (my guess is this isn’t the direction to go based on what you are describing, but I had to throw it out there). Some kids I’ve observed do better in a learning environment that is more open to free exploration and creativity. If she is academically advanced, there is a chance that she is one of those kids that will do better is she has some more ownership of her learning with a teacher who is more open to children who are a bit more of a free thinker. Overall, I have observed (as a former teacher) that the majority of the kids I have encountered do better with structure. However, there is this class of kids that feels squelched under the structure. This could be your child. If your daughter is gifted, she might be dealing with a whole different set of experiences. Here’s a link to a book I’m currently reading if you think that might apply: http://goo.gl/ITQqh8. It’s called “Emotional Intensity in Gifted Students: Helping Kids Cope with Explosive Feelings.” On a different note, I’m curious what kind of systems you have in place for dealing with consequences and rewards for behavior. I would definitely try and do that. You could have a reward chart. Every day your child’s behavior card stays on green at school (or some indication of proper behavior), she gets a small prize or sticker that works toward a bigger prize. In contrast, phone calls home or poor behavior leads to consequences based on her “currency” – privileges removed, TV or screen time taken away, more chores. Since it is happening against the school, I like the idea that she might have to do something to help the school, like pick up garbage around the permitter or playground, pick weeds, etc. One other thing to think about is if there is anything going on physically. Is she getting enough sleep? a proper diet? a healthy home environment? We found that my daughter was dealing with some health issues and couldn’t express, in a proper way, her discomfort. Now that we are dealing with some of those things, behavior is improving. I think those are my thoughts for now. I hope this has been a little helpful. Keep in touch. Stick with it. My consistent. It’s so hard. I know! It drives us to our wits end, but we just want to see our kids succeed. I’ve learned it is a marathon. You can do this.

Thank you for commenting. It’s definitely a process. It gets better and better though. I hope you have success here.

Thanks so much. When I learned this trick, it literally changed our lives. It was so helpful to have mentors. Part of this blog is me wanting to pass along all the useful information I’ve acquired from others much more wise than me.

That is such a huge compliment. Thank you for that. I’d love to hear how it goes with your 6 year old. Blessings!

First of all, I want to thank you so much for disagreeing so respectfully. I love to hear other opinions because I love to better myself as a parent and consider what other people believe and do. I went to bed considering what you were saying, and thinking about what I thought and how to respond.

I completely hear what you are saying. I, too, don’t want to stuff my children’s emotions. I cry. I get upset. I get angry. I expect my children to too. I would be concerned if they didn’t. It’s healthy. I believe that expressing emotions is very important. I just want them to learn how to do it in an effective way.

I added a clarifying few sentences to the post. This method does not apply to times they are sick, sad (a friend hurt their feelings, their dog died, etc.) I want to show compassion in those moments in their lives. What I am really talking about in this scenario is when they fall apart because they wanted the red playing piece and not the green one while we are playing a game. It’s when they fall apart for things that are all about them wanting things they can’t get. I do still want to talk through these things, but I need them to get control before we can be effective. I have experienced and believe that feeding into that through cuddling, negotiating, etc. teaches them that that is the way to behave if they want to get something. I want my kids to learn that the inappropriate reactions to their emotions isn’t received in a positive way. I might want something in my marriage, personal life, or job situation, but whining about it (which adults often do…me included) is not productive, and it’s not a Biblical attitude. I want to teach that young. Does that mean we don’t cry? of course not. However, when the crying escalates to crazy levels for little reason, it’s just not appropriate. After all, we don’t cry over spilt milk, right? I guess I have wanted to a couple times when it’s like the 20th thing I’ve had to clean up. 😉

The next thing to acknowledge is that we are all raising different kind of kids. I have one child who is highly dramatic. Everything could be something dramatic. We will be having the best day, and if one thing doesn’t go her way she will turn around and scream, “WORST DAY EVER!” and freak out. She has done this from a young age. The slightest thing can throw her off. However, I have learned that she can turn it on and off at the flip of a switch. It’s a show. It’s drama. I want to be able to believe her when things are really sad or she is really hurt. Therefore, the drama, whining and tears when times are not as bad as she thinks are is a type of “crying wolf.” I definitely see the positive side to her drama, but I have to parent it right so it doesn’t turn into manipulation. Not everyone is raising that kind of kid. As you have experienced that isolating a child causes it to get work, I have experienced the opposite. The more I feed into her drama, the bigger and louder and more dramatic she gets. We might just be raising different kind of kids.

I also want to make it very clear that when they are able to get some self-control over their emotions, we talk. We define the emotion they feel. “I understand you feel frustrated. Tell me why. How can we deal with this in a different way? We can problem solve this together.” or “I understand you really wanted that game piece. Do you know your sister really wanted it to? We need to learn to think of others and come up with a solution. Maybe she can use it this round, and you get to choose the next.” It’s not a method that is trying to just shove down all of their emotions and never use the moment as teachable. It’s not an escape. It is a chance for them to get control on their terms. I let them sit and kick the stairs, cry, feel upset and then come back so we can chat. If my children remain in the situation, then everyone there has to stop what they’re doing for inappropriate behavior. I don’t want to teach that whining will make them the center of attention.

You may still disagree, but I did want to give some more vision into what this looks like in our home. I totally agree with your heart in loving and supporting our children. In the end, I think both yours and mine will know our love for them, which speak loader than any method we might try.

Thank you so much for your opinion, and I’m so sorry it has taken me so long to write back. I try and stay on top of my comments, but trying to balance being a wife, mother, and all my other responsibilities as well as staying on all the components of being a blogger seems to be a challenge. Sometimes responding to the comments takes a back seat, and for that I apologize. I know you took the time to write, and I of course want to take the time to respond. I appreciate your thoughtful comments and passion for raising kids. I do hear what you are saying with your concerns. I totally agree with your thoughts on empathy, and that really is a component of my parenting. I have written about it here https://meaningfulmama.com/2012/12/day-361-tip-show-empathy.html and here https://meaningfulmama.com/2013/03/helping-kids-verbalize-their-emotions.html. I think it is a little challenging to see an overview of someone’s entire parenting through one article. I have found that with my daughters, one in particular, drama tends to escalate and she wants to control the situation. Therefore, sending her away to gain control so that we can come back together to explore emotions, take time to teach and communicate in a healthy way has been the most effective method for us. I also see this technique used my parents I respect who have been down the parenting road and have super well-balanced kids, and I tend to mimic some of their methods. I can’t find the source right now, but I’ve read that when a child’s brain escalates in anger, it has a certain amount of time to calm down before it can even function enough to listen. Therefore, this time aways is a calming time. In retrospect, I’m not sure “happy heart” is the term I really should have used with them. It’s more of a time to get self control so we can really be effective in our communication with one another. I, too, want my kids to know it’s OK to feel angry or frustrated. I want them to be able to label those feelings and understand that everyone feels those things. I know, however, that it’s my role to usher them through the stage of whining and crying to get what they want. This in no way says they can’t feel. I am so sorry about your experience with your dad and the pain it has caused you. I know I have told my kids over and over and over again that their feelings are real and valid and OK. It’s what we are going to choose to do with those feelings that moves us through, and that’s what I’m trying to teach. Are we going to scream, punch things and throw a fit or are we going to express ourselves in a way that is healthy – through conversation, healthy physical outlets, perhaps time alone or any other of solutions that might be a good fit for particular child (See https://meaningfulmama.com/2012/03/day-88-tip-ten-ways-to-calm-angry-child.html and https://meaningfulmama.com/2012/10/day-278-10-more-ways-of-helping-kids.html)? Again, I think you’d probably have to read all of my parenting tips as well as my character development stuff (particularly lessons on sensitivity/empathy) to get an overall picture of my parenting approach. I hope this is helpful. You may still disagree with the approach, but I have found that communicating with them when they are under control and know they aren’t manipulating the family dynamics by their drama has been super effective for us. I also want to add that I am super empathetic when it comes to sadness, sickness, frustrations and the like…it’s really the drama that escalates that I have little tolerance for. Thanks for taking the time to comment, and again for your obvious passion for doing the best thing for kids.

I definitely want my children to know that these feelings are real, but they can choose how to respond. We want to address their feelings and talk about them. These feelings can include frustration, anger, disappointment, jealousy, etc. Those feelings are real. However, how will be choose to respond. This morning, for example, my daughter fell apart about something, and we could trace it back to jealousy. Once she was able to get composure on the stairs (after the initial falling apart), we could have a real productive conversation about the dangers of jealousy, and we came up with the solution to think of three things we are grateful for when those feelings come to the surface. However, we would not be able to move forward in the conversation if she continued screaming and crying in rage. The feelings are normal. I talked to her about how I can feel jealous too, but it takes the self control to move past those moments and be productive in our thoughts and actions. Thanks for your contribution to the conversation.

I am so glad to hear this has been encouraging. My daughter can turn it on and off like that too. I can completely related. I’d love for you to check back in and let me know how it goes with him. Thanks so much for commenting!

Hello. Thanks so much for reaching out to me. 2’s and 3’s are so challenging. They are testing the boundaries and trying to figure out who is in control. I want to help as much as I can. I still deal with this with my own kids, but I do want to encourage you that it gets easier as you continue to work on it. I know mine do so much better when I am “on” with my parenting techniques. It takes a lot of focus and consistency. That is my first piece of advice. Consistency. Your daughter needs to know that there are consequences for behaviors. I would encourage time outs. You read my advice here for whining and crying. For an outright “no” in attitude or words, there will be a consequence in our home. You might quickly discover her currency (screen time, treats, a toy taken away, time outs, etc.). I would encourage you to respond in a calm way. I say something to the effect of, “I am sorry. We don’t say no to mommy like that. You have a consequence,” and follow through. On the flip side, I would try and set up a reward system as well. Every time your daughter responds the right way, she can earn a sticker, which may result in a prize once she has collected enough (a movie, game time, a Dollar Store trip, etc.). I try to go crazy with compliments when they’re responding the right way…over the top excited about their behavior. I try to train my kids to respond with a “Yes, Mommy” by playing a fun game – https://meaningfulmama.com/2012/01/day-4-tip-of-day-yes-mommy.html. Again, this takes consistency in practice, rewards and consequences. She should never be rewarded for poor behavior just to make it easier for you. When my kids are whining, having a bad attitude or disobeying, the answer is no in our house. Tonight, my daughter was disobeying before bed time. She asked if she could sleep on the floor in the sleeping bag. My response? “I wish you could. I would have said yes. However, you weren’t obeying me getting into bed so the answer is no. Maybe you could try it again tomorrow night.” Done. Crying…yes. No negotiations since there was disobedience. I know that much communication can’t happen with a two year old, but it can happen in your actions and at her level. You are in such a challenge phase with the ages of your kids. One thing I have had to keep in mind is that this is a marathon rather than a 50 yard dash. I begin to think that if I’m on top of it for a bit, they should just get it. What I fail to recognize is that obedience is going to be a life long lesson, and it’s going to take me recognizing that and walking in faith that things will get better. I am seeing the fruits too. Yes, we have moments…daily…and set backs (mostly when I’m distracted or not doing my job well), but there are a lot of improvements. You can do this. It’s hard work. Consistency is key. Here are a few more posts that might help: https://meaningfulmama.com/2012/12/day-362-make-expectations-clear.html, https://meaningfulmama.com/2012/07/day-190-tip-explanations-in-five-words.html, https://meaningfulmama.com/2012/06/day-157-tip-train-in-calm-gentle-voice.html, https://meaningfulmama.com/2012/04/day-109-tip-distinguish-between-willful.html and https://meaningfulmama.com/2012/01/day-17-tip-try-that-again.html. I hope that helps. Keep in touch.

So glad you find this helpful. I know it has made a huge difference in our world, and I hope you experience the same.

I’d encourage you to take from the article what works for you family. I completely understand people have different beliefs, and I respect that. For our family, we come from a Christian belief system, and we want to teach that to our children. For us, if we love a movie or a book, we’re going to tell our friends about it. We do believe in the love of God and all He has for us, and it would seem cruel to keep it ourselves and not share it. I still hope you’ll stop by Meaningful Mama and be able to get some inspiration…taking what makes sense to you and your family and leaving the rest for others. Thanks for taking the time to comment.

Thank you so much for taking the time to read the article, see my heart and comment so thoughtfully. I completely understand your reservations, and part of me thinks that people would almost need to see a video of our family working to understand it completely. I agree with your desire to get them to ask in a normal voice, and that is always our first attempt too. My kids seem pretty dramatic and can’t always pull it together as quick as yours. A common phrase in our family is, “Oh, try that again.” We want to give them the opportunity to get it together. However, we take this approach when they completely fall apart because they don’t get what they want. It might mean that we are playing a game, and one of their siblings wants the red game marker. The immediate response used to be (and sometimes still could be on an off day) freaking out, whining, crying and falling apart. I might give them an opportunity to try it again, but if they can’t, I send them away to get control. The way I see it, self control is one of the biggest things they’ll need to learn in life. I want to understand and help them to express their emotions, but I just don’t see the benefit of letting them gain positive attention, cuddles, etc. when they clearly are not communicating in an effective way. You know – I think school is hard for kids as they are adjusting, and I have experienced some of the same things you are experiencing. It seems to be getting better. That’s the encouragement. My kids get all praises at school. There is not one complaint from the teachers about behavior. However, I’ve seen them fall apart at home. I do believe that they have had so much restraint throughout the day and just lose it sometimes. I have tried to figure out how to best tackle this too. Food is a big thing. I know I need to get food in them right away because blood sugar is low at the end of the day. I also find that they might need some alone time to decompress. I also want to make sure they get enough exercise. It sounds like you’re doing such a great job. Hang in there. I’m experiencing that with consistency, things get a lot better…especially when I’m completely on it, which I hate to admit isn’t always the case. Blessings! Thanks for commenting.

Hello! I actually just responded to a similar comment, so I hope you don’t mind if I cut and paste my response. Otherwise, I think I’d just be typing the same thing over again. I hope you’ll have grace with me on that one. 🙂

Thank you so much for your opinion, and I’m so sorry it has taken me so long to write back. I try and stay on top of my comments, but trying to balance being a wife, mother, and all my other responsibilities as well as staying on all the components of being a blogger seems to be a challenge. Sometimes responding to the comments takes a back seat, and for that I apologize. I know you took the time to write, and I of course want to take the time to respond. I appreciate your thoughtful comments and passion for raising kids. I do hear what you are saying with your concerns. I totally agree with your thoughts on empathy, and that really is a component of my parenting. I have written about it here https://meaningfulmama.com/2012/12/day-361-tip-show-empathy.html and here https://meaningfulmama.com/2013/03/helping-kids-verbalize-their-emotions.html. I think it is a little challenging to see an overview of someone’s entire parenting through one article. I have found that with my daughters, one in particular, drama tends to escalate and she wants to control the situation. Therefore, sending her away to gain control so that we can come back together to explore emotions, take time to teach and communicate in a healthy way has been the most effective method for us. I also see this technique used my parents I respect who have been down the parenting road and have super well-balanced kids, and I tend to mimic some of their methods. I can’t find the source right now, but I’ve read that when a child’s brain escalates in anger, it has a certain amount of time to calm down before it can even function enough to listen. Therefore, this time aways is a calming time. In retrospect, I’m not sure “happy heart” is the term I really should have used with them. It’s more of a time to get self control so we can really be effective in our communication with one another. I, too, want my kids to know it’s OK to feel angry or frustrated. I want them to be able to label those feelings and understand that everyone feels those things. I know, however, that it’s my role to usher them through the stage of whining and crying to get what they want. This in no way says they can’t feel. I am so sorry about your experience with your dad and the pain it has caused you. I know I have told my kids over and over and over again that their feelings are real and valid and OK. It’s what we are going to choose to do with those feelings that moves us through, and that’s what I’m trying to teach. Are we going to scream, punch things and throw a fit or are we going to express ourselves in a way that is healthy – through conversation, healthy physical outlets, perhaps time alone or any other of solutions that might be a good fit for particular child (See https://meaningfulmama.com/2012/03/day-88-tip-ten-ways-to-calm-angry-child.html and https://meaningfulmama.com/2012/10/day-278-10-more-ways-of-helping-kids.html)? Again, I think you’d probably have to read all of my parenting tips as well as my character development stuff (particularly lessons on sensitivity/empathy) to get an overall picture of my parenting approach. I hope this is helpful. You may still disagree with the approach, but I have found that communicating with them when they are under control and know they aren’t manipulating the family dynamics by their drama has been super effective for us. I also want to add that I am super empathetic when it comes to sadness, sickness, frustrations and the like…it’s really the drama that escalates that I have little tolerance for. Thanks for taking the time to comment, and again for your obvious passion for doing the best thing for kids.

That’s great! We use that too, and I think it’s a great idea. Thanks for your comments.

Thank you so much for your thoughtful response, and I totally agree with your comments. They are really helpful for clarification of the heart behind this. I think there is a difference in sending to the room vs. someplace on the steps. Thank you for pointing that out. I really appreciate you commenting as someone who has more years of experience. Blessings!